When Sleep Won’t Come

By Qalbun Yakzan — The Heart That Can No Longer Sleep

When Sleep Becomes a Struggle

Anyone who has struggled with insomnia knows it does not end when the night does. You carry it into the next day — brain fog, unfinished chores, difficulty concentrating, and sometimes being too exhausted to enjoy the things you love.

I have chosen not to take sleeping tablets, so I keep searching — magnesium, ashwagandha, herbal teas, food and lifestyle changes. Sometimes something works beautifully for a few nights and I think, Alhamdulillah, perhaps this is it.

Then another sleepless night returns.

Sleep Is a Blessing

Perhaps we do not fully appreciate the blessing of sleep until it becomes difficult to find.

I still want my sleep back. I still search for answers and ask Allah for a cure. But something in my relationship with these sleepless nights has changed.

When Frustration Became Gratitude

For a long time, I kept thinking: Why can’t I sleep? How will I function tomorrow?

Eventually, I realised that while I could continue searching for a cure, I did not have to spend every wakeful hour fighting the fact that I was awake.

Part of that came from perspective. I see people living through oppression, bereavement and unimaginable hardship, and then look at everything Allah has given me — family, friends, safety and blessings I could never enumerate.

It reminds me of Surah al-Kawthar. At a time of immense personal sorrow, when RasulAllah ﷺ had suffered the loss of his sons and his enemies mocked him as abtar — cut off — Allah reminded him:

“Indeed, We have granted you ˹O Prophet˺ abundant goodness.”

— SURAH AL-KAWTHAR (108:1)

Even in loss, there was abundance.

Gratitude does not mean difficulty does not hurt. It means that while something hurts, I can still recognise everything Allah has given me.

My difficulty remained, but gratitude became louder than my frustration.

And when Fajr arrived, I was already awake to meet it.

I cannot say why Allah has allowed this particular difficulty into my life. We should never claim to know the wisdom behind His decree. But I can choose what I do with it.

Acceptance Is Not Giving Up

I still want to sleep. I still seek a cure.

• Acceptance and hope can exist together.
• I can accept what Allah has written for today while asking Him to change tomorrow.
• I can be tired and grateful.
• I can struggle and remain hopeful.

Perhaps this extends beyond insomnia. We often tell ourselves: When this problem ends, then I will be at peace. But there will almost always be something we are asking Allah for.

For the Woman Awake Tonight

Seek the cure. Make dua. Take the means available to you. Ask Allah for the sleep your body needs.

But while waiting for one door to open, do not overlook the doors already open before you.

• Maybe there is a Tahajjud you would otherwise have missed.
• Maybe there is a dua waiting to be made.

May Allah grant us healing and peaceful, restorative sleep, put barakah in our days, and make even our restless nights a means of drawing closer to Him. Ameen.

And In sha Allah, if I discover what finally works, I will come back and share it with you.